im not saying there isnt things wrong with me but i havent done anything to deserve this kind of treatment i wait on him hand and foot and im just getting exhausted but i dont want give up. I love him a lot- weve been together for 2.5 years- but Im starting to realize that despite my feelings for him, I cant continue on in the relationship if he isnt willing to understand my feelings and desires. But also in the past few months he has also started growing his own pot, which I cant handle. There are plenty more examples. I dont want to push him away. Not just that, sexually as well. We ended up living together briefly because he did not want to be apart from me. I have since ended the relationship as I feel it is a one way system with him taking and not giving. He has his mum doing everything for him. But he was not my husband and my family didnt approve of such activities before marriage. That bothers me because on his birthday I did get him a little something and also, called his sister to get his favorite chocolate cake and chocolate icing recipe of his moms who is deceased. He Is Nervous. After his birthday he left his sisters and moved in with his mom. We did this at least once a week. This article actually helped a lot but I dont rlly know how to let go. Can Your Husbands Affair Be Good for Your Marriage? Over the past 2 months something changed. Hi Beyza! I want him to want to make things better instead of just making decisions that arent beneficial to the relationship or are just downright harmful to the relationship. i simply dont understand this. I am lonely but at least Im not being rejected because Im not pretty enough or funny or have a lot of friends. I just dont know what to do. Ive mentioned his lack of effort and he did take it on bored but recently Im seeing a slip into his old ways. I get it Im not a good gamer but I like the company. Overuse of the phone, computer, social media, and video gamesalong with an unwillingness to unplug even after being askedis a big departure from the early "getting to know you" phase of your relationship when all conversations seemed interesting and all concentration was focused on your time together. I am doing all the work for us. That being said, on Christmas or birthdays or Valentines day, I expect something. I dont know what else to say about any of it, but I do know that Im getting more depressed by the day. Now he is distant and asked for time and space. Omgod girl leave him. I dont expect a perfect relationship but I guess he does. He doesnt have any plans in those days and still he can not make an effort to spend that day with me, meanwhile I have 2 birthday parties and was ready to ditch them to spend time with him. It isnt fair. He is not interested in knowing what my love language is. "I stopped trying altogether," he said. He doesnt ask about my life and hes still working with his ex wife in a business relationship. No boyfriend in the world can fill the emptiness that only God can fill. About 3 weeks after, right after a fight we had after my bday, he told him he cant find them. If they are willing- great! He starts fights or creates conflict for no reason then blames me. He has some property on the other side of town, he asked me to move in with him to establish a foundation. He has never been one to open up about problems he has with himself or our relationship. He says it just happened because we live in the same house, so it doesnt matter. i felt unhappy with it.. i wanted to give up but i feel like im the only one who can understand him and love him uncondtionally. I asked him if he could pick me up some tea from the shop as I was unwell. Are circumstances in your boyfriends life affecting how he relates to you and others? That is an abusive, toxic relationship and you deserve so much better! I have been with my boyfriend for one and a half years. Putting yourself out there to even carry on with friends will feel more exhausting each time till you get to the point where you just want anyone in your life at all. He constantly tells me he loves me but its starting to feel less true. Right now hes not even talking to me. Also said he is feeling low and has issues with his father (this something he always tell me tbh)He hasnt called me yet tho he promised he would. We have so much in common, yet not at the same time. I feel like I have to bow down to him because its always his way. i just dump my 2mnths loveless relationship before it gets deeper. So we decided to give it a try. My expectations: Be an adult while fighting. I cannot communicate with him. I went back to check on him and he was online for like a minute..(Thinking he was asleep I left sweet messages for him to read when he wakes up. He has way more money than me and said he didnt do anything because he was angry at me. What I got from this is that it is OK for a male to not understand what he wants in a relationship, but a female should bow down down no matter what. My birthday weekend was really rough. Its just hard because he watches my son while Im at work and my sons dad is working out of town for a month on and a week off. I cant say no because if I do I feel like Im being lazy and letting them down, plus they get mad at me for saying no. Ive been with my boyfriend for 2 years and recently he has started to change. If, for example, your boyfriend is dealing with work stress, emotional health issues or family problems then you can might want to give him some time and space. Cant believe how common my situation is right now. Somewhere around the last 2-3 months have been nothing but fights. and drags me with this idea too. I truely love him i said i ll forgive. I am so sorry you are going through this. Thats it. Day after, he went for work in other city and stayed there for 3months. We live together also, in a large house he bought with his ex. This person flakes when we have plans even after I said that Im not here for that. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years. He said he is trying to change. When we first started dating I personally felt like he put so much effort into me and the relationship. Girl, you need to ditch him. it makes me feel like hes okay with giving me the minimum because he knows i will accept it. Something went down and he doesnt want to confess. Get away from him immediately! We are an older couple early 60s. Everything now has become a tit-for-tat pissing match competition for control and autonomy. Its sad when other give you the compliments that you are looking from in one person. We live in one of the coolest states in the world, Orlando Fl. Me and him didnt talk much because my mom found out more about my bf and i also couldnt sneak ipads anymore. Its going to make me fall out of love as he is so defensive and cannot solve the issue. Disappointment is a strong emotion to deal with. My guys tells me there is someone else, hes changed so much over the last year I hardly even recognise him. I feel you. Apologize when wrong Be honest. I have 2 kids and he has 1(im 22 hes turning 23). Nothing. He really hurt me in the past (when we werent together) regarding other girls but hes never actually done anything when weve been going out. 2 years ago, something was off in our relationship and he wasnt making effort with me, almost at all. I know we also havent been talking quite as much because were both busy with work. But he never tells me how he feels when I ask. Should I quit or continue with the relationship? You, me, and probably thousands of other girls are in the same boat right now with the Coronavirus. We were living together but decided to try living apart since we jumped into the relationship. I have told him that I will be losing a lot when I move career wise. I dont think he knows how a relationship works or I am just difficult to be with. When he just cuts me off or just blindly follows what his mum says which is most of the time unreasonable it just makes me feel like he doesnt care too much about me, like he isnt willing to fight for me. He said he was torn and worried about Coronavirus. We have had sex, one time. I got up today and did mine in bed, he continued browsing the web on his phone which is all he does now when we are together. He may be afraid to show sensitivity, make sure to let him know that its okay for him to cry. When he wants to intimate with me i have told him severl times i do not trust you,because i couldnt forget that incident. My boyfriend had proposed me to marry him on 3rd month dating.. then he was stressed up with his business he didnt know how to handle .. i started helping him and give him directions.. he was getting through in a good way ,though at times i had to push him as he haf started giving up.. but then he broke up with me while am at my work place .. it was terrible..but i couldnt let my personal issues interfere with my work i locked the door of my office and kept on working with tears.. three months later he comes back .. but again he hasnt mentioned he needs a favour .. but he kinda mentioned about something that i was helping him out with telated to his business.. i offered him help yet lol.., and the matter is going well on his favour and he has pulled off again.. bi communication.. am glad i had asked him once if he just came around cause he wanted favour.. he said he still have strong feelings for me.. but deep inside i know he is just using. InWhen He Doesnt Make Time for You: How to Create More Love in Your Relationship, Byron Katie shows a man how to build a better relationship by questioning thoughts such as I want him to spend more time with me.. He says he doesnt want to text and show love and tells me to be patient. I sometimes wonder if my daughter was dating someone like him, if Id tell her to ditch him. I begun to be desperated just to win him back but hes tough enough to avoid me and forget everything we had. Sometimes even i dont get it,If im asking for too much. He said I did agree to go to the park this weekend. Its long distance and he is 8 hours ahead of me. If youre last on your boyfriends list of priorities, then you need to stop wondering what to do when he makes no effort in your relationship. I know love makes me blind, could anyone tell me what I have been missing in this relationship please? Hi, I really need help/advice Me and my boyfriend have been together for 9months and we really do love each other but a couple weeks ago we just didnt talk as much or communicate in person & I asked him if he wants this relationship and he said hes lost feelings for me (but he doesnt know and his heads abit lost) and it doesnt feel like were together anymore because the conversation is dead. Maybe hes too heavy into the party, drugs, and alcohol scene. but thats what made me fall in love with him and now that i feel like the efforts arent made or not even made but not wanted, not driven, not desired as he felt before. And I know its not healthy to compare your relationships to others but Id be lying if I said I never wish my relationship was more like others. 36 Questions to Ask Your Partner That Lead to Love, 6 Signs Youre Growing Apart From Your Partner, take a negative toll on your relationship, determine if the partnership is worth mending. 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